Hollylooyah

Recipe Debacle
I just did a search for recipes using lentils because I have just discovered that I really like them. So I found a great sight and was printing off eleven pages of recipes. I was using recycled paper that had been used already on one side. As it was printing, I discovered that I had sent it to the printer THREE times. I decided to print it twice since the second time was almost done but cancel the third. Then I got to noticing what was on the other sides of the recipes. Remember, I was considering giving these to someone else.

Here are the funny juxtapositions between the front sides and the back sides of the papers.
On the back side of:
*Baked Bulgur with Pecans... Instructions for circumcision care
*Black Beans with Peppers and Cumin Vinaigrette... Proper bathing sequence for babies
*Black Bean Chili with Toasted Spice Seasoning...How to take a rectal temperature
*Black Bean Burritos... Dressing your baby
*Black bean Chili Burgers... Sucking out your baby's nose with a bulb syringe
*Bulgur and Lentil Pilaf... Breastfeeding reading list

I am not sure who to send these to. If this sort of grotesque juxtaposition is not really an issue for you, I will send the first respondant the stack of recipes. Any takers?

Overheard recently (no kidding) at Zanzibar's, my favorite coffee bar
Girl#1: "Well, I just finished knitting the vagina."
Girl#2: "Really! Let me see it! Wow, that's great!"
About this time the girl has Scott's and my attention... So we turn around. There is a group of college girls from Drake knitting at a table with cups of tea. One is holding a wool version of... yes, that part of the female anatomy, mentioned above. She has knitted one from yarn, quite realistically, I might add, when you consider she only has fibers to use as her medium. Noticing our amused/quizzical expressions she tells us how it is her mascot because she is directing the Drake performance of "The Vagina Monologues."
Scott and Holly after explanation: "OOOOOOHHHHH!" As if it makes perfect sense, and there really isn't anything weird at all about knitting a vagina from yarn and then using it as your mascot. I mean, that is a perfectly reasonable past time. I actually have knitted a few breasts out of a fantastic imported yarn and handy little tools I like to use for potty training--- teeny little child size replicas of bodily waste (all of which I have chosen to incorporate into our family crest, hanging on our front door). I like to think that we should not be ashamed of our bodies, and one way to do this is to incorporate them into what I like to call "Anatomically Correct Family Craft Night." Apparently her mother was a firm believer in this sort of witty and liberated familial bonding which can make any family "close-knit."

As worldly wise as a like to think I am... to be hones, I am still a little taken aback to see billboards up all over the place with "The V****a Monologues" in huge giant-scale letters!

Coffee Count :
Monday-- I had a white mocha at the coffee bar in the hospital. The "barrista," and I use the term loosely, literally made it without coffee! Have you ever heard of such a thing? He made, I guess what would be a white chocolate steamer! I had to pay extra to go back and get some coffee to add to it!

I was seriously upset because then I saw the doctor that messed up Noah's care in the NICU. She didn't recognize me and was talking to me abut Andy and how cute he was or something. I was holding myself back from ignoring her for a bit then saying, "Oh, I'm sorry were you talking to me and was I not listening? Oh, that reminds me of when I was talking to you about how poorly my son was doing and how you told me I was PARANOID and then how he almost died and it was all YOUR FAULT. Ta-ta!" But I didn't. I had a little well of anger inside me that was begging to be unleashed. But, good or bad, I stuffed it!

Then the sky opened up and the sun shone round about me and I was sore afraid. And, lo, the angel of the mall said, "What kind of coffee do you want?" When the scales fell from my eyes, I saw Kim standing in front of me-- light shooting out of the ends of her hair... hand out giving me a skinny mocha from the mini Younkers tearoom. Delightful and unexpected!

Tuesday Morning (today)
I continued incorporating a pleasurable walk into my French Diet/ Lifestyle Change. I walked to La Mie and ordered a Caramel Pecan Tart for company Friday! Then I had a 16 ounce black coffee that was good all the way down. It brought a smile to my face and a tingle to my spine.

My walk around the 'hood
First of all, it really got my Laura Ingalls instincts up again. Lots and lots of snowdrifts... there is also a lot of fog that gives a sort of Midnight Lace feel. (If you haven't seen it - rent it and watch it soon) I saw a teenage girl hop out of her dad's car at school and stomp off. I remember doing stuff like that, sorry mom and dad! I love talking to neighbors, some day I'm going to say, "Top 'o the Mornin' to ya!" when I pass someone on the sidewalk.

Books you should read but I am too lazy to review-
Paris to the Moon by Adam Gopnik
The B***h in the House (Sorry, It really isn't about profanity)
Bridget Jones Diary
Bridget Jones the edge of Reason both by Helen Fielding
Fast Food Nation
Anything by Jonathan Kozol
The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning
Becoming Orthodox by Peter Gillquist
Thirsting for God in a Land of Shallow Wells by Gallatin
The Mommy Myth by Douglas and Michaels
Savoir Flair by Polly Platt
The House of Mirth
Any book by Anne Lamott
Any book by Phillip Yancey
The Harry Potter books
The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S.Lewis
Any and all Beverly Cleary books
Any and all Roald Dahl books
An Unexpected Joy (Thanks for the recommendation mom)
Sixty Million Frenchman Can't be Wrong
Any book by Grace Livingston Hill (especially April Gold and The Honor Girl)


Books I did not like for some reason or another:
The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren
The Prayer of Jabez by Bruce Wilkinson
The Da Vinci Code
Let Me Hear Your Voice by Catherine Maurice


I was reading through my journal and I found that last year at about this time, I was aching for the sun and spring. I must have been feeling like I was losing myself in the great motherhood fog 'cause I wrote this poem...

Sun, warmth, calm
air on my skin
arms around my neck
sand, waves, paperbacks
no one judging
relaxed, my face feels fluid
my body floats in blissful rest
no clocks- no dishes- no therapy- no fights
I'm Holly again.
I'm just a YOUNG woman
with a husband
and two kids
and we are so happy.

I'm feeling on the one hand sort of spiritually impoverished and on the other hand sort of where I need to be. I have spent so much of life life proudly feeling "in the know" and now I am feeling less confident but maybe that's more on the right track. My prayers, as a mother in one of Anne Lamott's books says, are two kinds. There's the "Help Me" prayer and the "Thank You" prayer peppered with mini worship times throughout the week. I attend the liturgy on Sundays and that helps, but I can't get over the pressure I felt for a long time that I wasn't a good enough Christian. Why the paradoxes? It's all about grace, but yet we're always feeling bad. Why did my dear friend say, "I like hanging out with the pagans, sometimes they're nicer than the Christians." I have heard so many other Christians and non Christians say that too. Why are we competitive? As another friend mentioned, "In my old Christian life I felt that the answer to every problem was 'Read the Bible and pray' Rinse and repeat!" Why, in a book Scott just read, did a waitress say that the worst tippers were the ones who wore their Christianity publicly? Why are Christians disunified as a body? Why can't we worship together? I feel angry sometimes and hurt judgmental and unforgiving. The worst of it all is right now I am not sure that I necessarily want to fix it and that is a REALLY BAD PLACE in which to live. One the flip side, I know Christians who will give you anything you would ask for. They would do just about anything for you. I also know that Scott and I have not really felt like our personalities and gifts are useful to anyone--- which is a foundational part of the body of Christ-- to be useful--- to use one's gifts.

The place I am at right now is the place where I am sort of hanging on... I'm throwing up prayers like "Jesus, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner." Sort of a plea for rescue, I guess. Especially on the dark days where I get down about Noah, when little, bad things happen and I feel so alone. That's when I'm not the victorious Christian. I don't feel like the Christian soldier moving onward. I feel like the one who's at the end of the line, the one that causes people to say to themselves, "Well, at least I know I'm not like her. She can't be good. She's not smiling, she's not greeting people. She's so self centered. And worse, she doesn't fit the definition of true Christian." Yeah, that's me, the one bringin' up the rear. ( And that's a pretty big rear!)

When people are like that, I take one look, and I walk away. I am sick of berating myself based on other people's judgments. That's when I would rather sit by myself and drink a latte. 'Cause you know what? I believe the Sermon on the Mount. I revel in stories about Rahab and Mary Magdalene and the woman at the well and the thief on the cross and David. Those are the ones I hold on to. If I am granted a place in the kingdom. It sure isn't gonna be that I had perfect faith or even maybe the right kind of faith... it's gonna be because God saw me down here and he had pity on me and he could see that little mustard seed of faith in my brain that maybe didn't quite make it to my heart, or maybe it's the other way around. I am hoping that he will see past the selfishness and the difficulties with holding grudges and that He'll see that I had the "want to" even if I didn't always have the "I did it."



Sometimes people tick me off
in their complaints about their children
in their belief that Noah is disabled so that God could "get my attention"
in the criticism of other parents with special needs kids
in their judgement of my utilizing services available for people with disabilities
in their fierce desire for me to "look at the positive"
in their belief that good people have "good" kids
in their secret belief that they had something to do with their kid being brilliant
by what their judgment really means... If they were in my life, they could do it better (or so they think)
by discarding the public schools and leaving children, like Noah, who have to be there without advocates
by saying the phrases, "What a spaz" or "That's so retarded" or "I felt like a Rainman."
by having Noah removed from places because they are afraid he will hurt their precious wussy kids
by not understanding
by judging people on welfare and unwed mothers
by not caring about the thousands of Iowa kids in foster care
by insulting my husband or my kids
by staring at Noah and then not smiling
by only being our friends if they feel that we are a "good investment for their time"

I feel justified in my anger, but I know that it is not right to harber bitterness and grudges. I really need to work on this, I am looking forward to my first confession at church with the priest. I am ready to be unburdened!

When I figure out how to manage my posts a little better I am going to try formatting my blog to make a little more sense, but until then, it is all going to sort of run together. I have been wanting to incorporate personal book reviews into my Blog. So here goes...

Almost French by Sarah Turnbull
Do you have wanderlust? If you do, then Almost French is a great book for you to read. Turnbull is an earthy adventurer from down under. She meets a Frenchman and decides to get to know him a little better by moving to France. Six years of learning about the French culture and about herself end with a marriage to Frederic, her Frenchman. I loved the observations she makes about the French culture. She aims for understanding in her everyday life, but she doesn't allow rudeness either. Especially funny are the scenes in which she is able to come up with the perfect comeback in French for the certain saucy people she inevitably meets. She touches on the famous French bureaucracy and shares how she gets around it. Also, she adds great input for my French Diet and also tells us what not to wear in France... especially Paris. Read this book!

Quote of the Day
Not all who wander are lost.
J.R.R. Tolkien

French Diet and Latte update
This morning I had to push my French Diet to another level. It was time to incorporate physical activity. Before you judge me... I walked to a coffee shop AND I tried to enjoy the walk as a walk in and of itself. For example, when I had to sled down a huge snowdrift, I thought to myself, "Now this is something Laura Ingalls would do." And when I had to tiptoe around the icy sidewalk I told myself, "Wow, this frozen sidewalk looks like something out of the Sierra Club calendar." I saw a schoolbus and was brought to tears when I saw a little boy I thought was Noah until I got home and realized it couldn't have been him because he was just then getting on the schoolbus. All in all it was a very good experience. I feel really lucky to live in the part of Des Moines that has at least 5 coffee shops that are within a mile and a half of my house! I see it as a neighborhood filled with fitness opportunities!! Oh yeah, I had a 16 ounce white mocha from Grounds for Celebration. It was delicious, hot, and the barristas there are friendly.



On Another Note
Would everyone who reads this please try to incorporate the word "Goshnabbit" into their vocabulary? It is a little swear word that Noah made up, and I thought that we should try to start a fad. So from now on when you drop the hammer on your toe or bump your head say, "Goshnabbit!"

Winter Daydreams
Yesterday I woke up thinking, "I need to move somewhere further south!" So yesterday Rebekah, Peter, Deanna, and I sat around dreaming and looking up southern locales on the internet. We decided the Savannah, Georgia is a great possibility. We looked at Charleston, South Carolina but the real estate is Sky high these days! In Savannah we could get an old historic home for a really great price.
Here are my criteria if we ever were to move:
1. The location must be significantly warmer than Des Moines, Iowa. This definitely rules out Minneapolis, New York, and Chicago (even thought I love these places)... not to mention North and South Dakota and Montana, Nebraska, Wyoming, Idaho, Maine, Vermont, Wisconsin, Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Alaska!

2. A large body of water nearby, preferably an ocean. This, of course, rules out anywhere else in Iowa, also Missouri, Arkansas, Kansas, Oklahoma, Indiana, Nevada, New Mexico, Colorado, New Jersey, Tennessee, Kentucky, Illinois, Arizona or West Virginia.

3. Coffee shops within walking distance of where we live.

4. Scott wants a lot of sunshine. So unfortunately that rules out Washington and Oregon.

5. But not too much... No Texas or Florida.

6. I have to be able to go to school there if I want to.

7. Reasonable house prices... No California, Washington D.C, or Massachusetts.

8. Great programs for kids with Autism.

9. Good computer jobs, an art museum, charm, oh yeah and an orthodox church.

Hmmm... maybe heaven????? If anyone know of any place that meets some if not all this criteria... e-mail me.

Blog, do you ever have anything in your life that is so good it makes you sad and so sad it makes you cry? That is sometimes how I feel. Like tonight, Noah was falling asleep on the couch next to me and Scott. I looked up at Scott and he had tears in his eyes. I, of course, started to cry too. We were both just in awe of how little he is, how innocent, sweet and defenseless. It seems so strange to think of him growing up. We are going through one of those times where we just feel like crying a lot. It's weird, but sometimes those are the times when I think we are the closest... the ones where we are the only ones who can know what the other one is feeling.

Andy is such a lighthearted joyous person to have in our lives. The boys are complements to each other. Noah brings the worldly wise caution and Zen-like wisdom... he has the ability to be himself- unapologetically reflective and meditative- autistic. He brings himself, free of societal expectations. Noah brings the perspective. Andy brings the laughter, the flashes of passion and anger, the demands for a better world. Noah seeks to leave the world behind and to find peace with his little "sticks" that he waves around and his thumb and his blankie and Bob Dylan. Andy tries to make peace with a pat on the head or a sympathetic look so wise for a one year old. A good day for Noah might entail a bus ride, a favorite book, a new stick or straw or pencil, a tickle game, or a splash in the tub. A good day for Andy would be an apple, a hug, his rainbow pattern snorting pig, finding a new place to hide the remote, or getting a Sesame Street magazine in the mail.

Valentine's Day... It's a weird day to reflect upon. It makes me laugh to see people buy things for their loves at the last minute... some of it junk that they really won't use again, but then it's also sweet that people follow this tradition. It is hard to sum up what Scott means to me in a card. I mean he means so much... too much. We have shared the birth of a child, vacations, deaths, the whole foster parenting experience, four different residences, countless hours of wallpaper removal, two marathons, world travel with an autistic child, leading a youth group, and LIFE. He balances the checkbook, is an awesome father, and for Valentine's Day he gave me a gift certificate to my favorite coffee shop. If you know me at all or read my Blog, you know that this is HUGE! I mean this is kind of like my earthly daily bread... coffee, that is. He knows that giving me free trips to Zanzibar's is like giving Turkish Delight to Edward in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. I just can't get enough (of coffee or time with my Scooter).

Todays Coffee Count: Only one white mocha from Grounds For Celebration. Only one, but it was magnificent!

Sometimes, like today, I feel like my mouth is moving nonstop. By the end of the day my face is so tired from smiling, talking, and laughing. I had friends over and I think sometimes I freak people out because being around me is sort of exhausting. I even find myself grabbing people. It's probably really scary. Luckily I am only five feet two because I could also be intimidating if I were taller. Note to self: aim to be calmly gracious instead of overpoweringly vivacious. Oh well, Scott loves me!


Andy loves to wear his hawaiian print shirt, truck cardigan, and striped socks... all at the same time. Already he is developing his own fashion sense. I try to let him pick out his clothes a little even though he is only one. Noah also loves clothes and the sensory feeling of new ones. He gets excited to get something new and will hop around to show his enjoyment. Last week I bought the boys several outfits. They had me put the new clothes on over their old ones. Watching them run around so happy made me want to get them new things more often. Andy was wearing a hat with a little yellow rugby and Noah was wearing a red, white, and blue track suit. I kept snapping pictures because they kept doing cuter and cuter things.

Today's lattes-- White mocha... grounds for celebration (the barrista was so sweet... she brought it all the way around the counter and said, "Have a great day.") and from La Mie... a mocha.

Here's an interesting thing to happen to me since exploring Orthodox Christianity... I unwittingly have been carrying holy water in my purse for a week... ever since the priest came to bless our house. I was sitting in my docent class and begin rummaging around my purse for a pen. Voila! Holy Water! I remembered then that I had put it there after we had sprinkled our new van. I am not used to objects having any sort of meaning beyond themselves. It is sort of hard to get used too, but also natural in a way.

I love how sparse my house seems to be getting. I don't mind if things break because sometimes I feel so hampered by my STUFF anyway. It sometimes sounds so wonderful to live in a house with minimal furniture. I envision mats or thin mattresses to sleep on. Fluffy cushions or even hammocks to sit on during the day. No tv... maybe a radio or stereo. A zen garden outside... Ah, the pull of simplicity. I like not really having anything exceptionally valuable. Maybe I will keep having my huge garage sale every year until I have barely anything left. I have noticed that paring down my kitchen to the basics has made it easier to cook. I don't have to unload my cupboards to get just one thing out. Let's see how long it stays that way! I always think I want it to be sparse, and then I go out and buy things like the flowered bread tube from The Pampered Chef or pink sprinkly sugar for cookies. I don't have basic things like a wire whisk but I have an apple peeler, corer, slicer and five pie plates. If I ever needed five pie plates it would occur at the same time I need a hole in the head.

Java status:

Saturday: Grounds for Celebration...One white mocha and one chocolate dipped biscotti
Also two 16 oz. cups of Columbian Supremo from the mini Younkers tea room

Sunday: Frederich's... One Kiss me Mocha- Mmm-mmm! (free with completed punch card... booyah!) Celebrity style eating twist... I did not get the biggest size!!!! Really!!! I opted for the slightly more healthful 12 oz. size.

Monday (so far): One white mocha from Grounds for Celebration. Home brew: One entire pot of Fireside Blend from Caribou Coffee. Future plans for this evening include a trip to Starbucks after work with my good buddy, Kim.

A Home Organization Triumph

Living in an old house, my bathroom closet door does not shut very easily; therefore guests in my home are often treated to unsightly storage. This includes (but is not limited to) feminine products. Obviously these are not for my guests to view, but require easy access. My organization solution???? I put them in a delightful storage box. Martha, dear, if you get sent to prison... don't be surprised if I take over the reigns at Living. You have trained me too well.

Stinky pants changed as of 3:02--- 3

Loads of laundry completed-- 4

Videotapes ruined--1

Hairpulling episodes (between the children, that is -- not counting those inflicted upon myself by myself) -
too many to count

Here's a tidbit. I was just talking to a friend on the phone... we were both eating Beef Ramen Noodles. At the SAME time!! Coincidence? I think not. It is a well known fact that women (of a certain age) tend to eat Ramen noodles for lunch. Statistics have shown that Ramen noodle consumption increases each year between the ages of 18 and 34. At that time (age 34) Ramen noodles begin to cause a gag reflex not easily remedied. The consumption of Ramen drops to a weekly rate of 1 women per 1000 by the age of 45. Scientists predict that Ramen noodle consumption could bottom out soon, however, because of the amount of women (specifically mothers of young children) who drop suddenly dead between the ages of 18 and 34. There is no REAL explanation for this, but some experts say it could be due to overuse of wet wipes and slimfast by the demographic. Soup kitchens are being set up in more progressive towns so that these young women (specifically young mothers) can get a hot lunch (not Ramen) and a blood test checking for the presence of wet wipe chemicals and Slimfast. Says top health expert, Dr. Cyril E. Neufbergersonshire, "Women are unfortunately consuming high levels of Slimfast, wet wipe products, and Ramen. These three together form the toxin triad known as BM-BM (Busy Moms and Bowel movements). If we cannot help these women, we may find more women dropping suddenly dead. This will drastically increase the amount spent on childcare, domestic chores, and healthy foods due to outside influences of domestic support. These stay at home moms dropping dead however will hurt the economy by the decreasing amounts of money spent on chocolate, diet products, Oprah's book club selections, and air fresheners." If you would like to help... send your donation to "BM-BM Women's support center, Des Moines, Iowa 50312."

I had a delectable white chocolate mocha AND a chocolate dipped biscotti today. Because it is Friday and because I led my first tour at the art center today, I felt that a latte was in order.

I hit a garbage can today. Technically it is sort of a two car accident because the garbage can is made out of recycled tire rubber. Hence it is not entirely my fault.

As I said, today was the first tour I led at the Des Moines Art Center. It was so fun! Here's a few highlights...

*The kids said their favorite part was the elevator. Really, they did. BUT the elevator is REALLY, REALLY COOL. It is in the Richard Meier wing, and it is huge! I have to admit, it's my favorite part too.

*They also renamed a Miro... "Starlight, Starbright; we're having watermelon tonight."

*One little boy said, "How come whenever I go into a new room there is a mean guard who is glaring at me?"

*Also when asked, "What is one thought you would like to take away from today?" A young boy promptly replied, "One thought I would like to take away? I would like to take away the thought of the naked man sculpture. I don't really like to think about naked men."

*My favorite, "You are the best tourist, the other classes' tourists didn't let them ride in the cool elevator." HA! Take that other tour guides (tourists)!


I got home and my darlings were waiting for me with adorable little smiles. Having opportunities to develop myself makes coming home all the more beautiful and sweet. I love my babies!

I haven't had any lattes today, and I am feeling it. My addiction is pushing me to the edge. I don't know what I could do. I am very unpredictable. This could be serious. I am going to have to make myself a cup of regular joe and suck it up. If only I were a barrista I could make myself a latte. The agony!!! Of an addictive personality!!! Deprived of an addiction!!!! It's only 8:20, I could drive to the coffee shop by myself, but that would be too pathetic this late wouldn't it? That's okay, I don't care if I am pathetic. That does it... I am going. I am going to order a mocha blanc from Zanzibar's. I'll let you know how it was, good ol' blog. You're always there for me. Wait! Would a skinny, sophisticated French person drink this after having a large supper? Hmm... I am guessing not. A celebrity definitely would not, they would probably have something sugar free and fat free. Just exactly how bad do I want to be skinny... Not really that bad. I kinda like myself the way I am. BUT, is it really healthy to have an espresso drink right before bed AND sugar and a little fat?

From the inner workings of the BLOG, "No. No, it is not."

BLOG! You have kept me from Zanzibar's. You are a genius. Thank you blog. Tell me what to do, Blog. Send the message telepathically, Blog.

I HAVE GOT IT! I will have some herbal tea. Yes, that is what I will do. I am visualizing the herbal tea. I am the herbal tea. Hot herbal tea. Caffeine free, sugar and fat free, filled with helpful herbs. Why didn't you tell me this before?

The Hollylooyah Car-us

Oh minivan, sweet minivan
you're my office on wheels
and you're
sleek, so-phis-ti-ca-ted, unapologetic
in your prac-ti-cal-i-ty.

Hum your little hum
beep and toot and sparkle-
sweety... too, too cute.

Opening the door for the kids
at the push of a teensy button
you surround us in a cushion of airbags
you open your little sunroof for us
when we need the sun.

You play my soul music
even my garage welcomes you

'cause everybody knows...

You are Good company.






Mocha Status

Yesterday, being a high stress day, I had two creme de menthe mochas. Out of the two I much preferred the one from Zanzibar's (their drink is known as a Merry Minty Mocha). The other one I had from a location which shall remain nameless was GREEN it had so much mint syrup in it! Yuck!


Jesus Christ Superstar- a rock opera

We went to see Jesus Christ Superstar. It was pretty good, but I was so pumped for an awesome resurrection scene with cool special effects, and it was so anticlimactic. They didn't even touch the resurrection. So.... I decided I will come up with my own ending... Sorry Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice!!

Okay, so the crucifixion fades, and the evil people are calling to Jesus trying to welcome him into the world of death. Mary Magdalene and the apostles mourn, possibly a slow mournful song... THEN... The entire stage lights up with rows and rows of white lights and the entire stage is filled with an entire choir clothed in white, swaying in the gospel way... Singing an enthusiastic song giving raise to God. Colored spotlights swarm all over the choir changing their robes to undulating psychedelic colors, while from the center Jesus rises up out of the center all the way above the choir. He sings what he said before the ascension and then raises up to heaven. The choir breaks into an even more frenzied gospel song with sparkly, glitzy flecks fall from above and in lights behind the singers, "Jesus- Friend of Sinners" flashes again and again. Then the curtain call.


French Diet Update...
So far I have lost 1.5 pounds!!


Things my children disassembled today...

My tupperware collection, the laundry, the toybox, the audiovisual cabinet


Things my children actually tried to play with that could have killed them...

a screwdriver, the oven, the bathtub


Strange things my children did that don't really fit another category...

climbed on the dining room table, threw broccoli, tried to eat powdered mashed potates, stripped naked and ran around


Absolutely adorable things my children did...

pretended to make dinner, asked for more kisses, collapsed in giggles, took naps, asked me to read to them, screamed with joy upon finding a magazine with animals in it

The dictionary defines "handicap" as follows:

An added burden given to a superior contender in order to equalize the contest

Noah, my adorable, unique son with autism loves to ride the bus. I sometimes wonder what he is thinking in that serious little head of his!


Bus Ride

he wears his vest
his feeding pump to the side
on the green vinyl seat he sits

his head straining to see out the window
hands at attention for the slightest
NOISE
he will cover his ears but smile and bounce a little

my boy
my little preschooler
with overalls and spectacles and a toothy grin

he tromps down the aisle
he throws himself into my arms skipping the steps for now
he stomps his way up the driveway

pouts a bit

so eager for ol' 626 to carry him tomorrow

To all my guilt laden curvaceous girlfriends out there.

Why is it that people in France eat rich food and are so THIN? They live a long time too! I am convinced that a lot of the answer lies in activity level and portion control. Another theory of mine is that rich food and rich living is more satisfying, leading you to feel less needy for food. I am sick of diets that beat you up and center around guilt and deprivation. I want to enjoy my life!! Hence, I have developed what I call, The French Diet.

Here are the instructions for following The French Diet.

1. Eat food that is nutritious and satisfying. Imagine... "Would a skinny, sophisticated French person eat this?" Seriously, just try it! You should eat three times a day and possibly have a midafternoon snack. The key is to set out a reasonable portion size and stop there. You should not eat any fast food or empty calories unless you absolutely have to.

2. Try to walk anywhere that you can. If you must, incorporate a stroll, bike ride, or fun run into your daily life, but ONLY if you incorporate rule # 3.

3. Enjoy the sensory experiences of every day life. Breathe deeply, take scented baths, wear perfume, blissfully enjoy your meals, pamper youself with cleanliness and simplicity in your environment, and prepare and present yourself as a charming person looking the way YOU want to.

4. Without becoming a total hedonist, do things you really want to do... Read books, drink your Toffee Nut Latte (I actually count mine as a meal or a snack--I consider the caffeine a vital nutrient I cannot go without!), listen to music, buy something for yourself, buy good quality food, coffee and produce... you get the idea.

5. Be honest about your feelings, and don't allow guilt.

6. If you are a reflective person keep a journal with your weight and your awesome, rich daily experiences enjoying every day to the fullest.

7. Get rid of anything in your house, schedule, or life that takes up needed brain space. Know what I mean?

Good luck on your new lifestyle!